The Biscuit Barrel

Silliness, or a deep metaphor for modern angst?

Archive for Martie 2010

I hit my head today

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Billy looked at the dark foreboding sky, his faser at his waist. It was useless now, it’s battery hadn’t run out. It was mostly the fact that it was a toy that made it more than useless. But faith gives power. The ongoing war proved that. In the sky a billion microscopic particles danced around in eddies. They were once houses, cars, cute puppies and, of course, trekkies and star wars fans alike. He crawled back into his mortar-made foxhole. Who would have thought belief would go that far.

The third war wasn’t caused by such beliefs as chrestianity, or muslims. It had nothing to do with the terrorist attack sthat happened around the time it started. That was just a sideshow attraction. The internet made a lot of things happen in the world. It brought cultures together and it allowed for unprefedented communication between the peoples of earth but they only really used it to watch twisted porn from other parts fo the world (a heads up to you here, Japan!) and to throw shit at one another becaause of diferences in opinion. SOmetimes just for the sake of it. It was for ”Teh LOLZ” as it were. The whole thing escalated insanely. Seeing the power they could wield the new masters of the most indoctrinated people in the world decided to fight each other in a long campaign that started with lolcats and demotivationals and ended in full fledged murder.

The bombing of Vulcan, Alberta by the Rogue Squadron started it all.

They had the wish but lacked the way to do it. Ebay, however, was there to help and sold them a couple of old B52s which they subsequently used to bomb the living daylights out of the place. When, in the light of this tragedy, all George Lucas did was laugh, Shatner rallied his troups.  Starfleet was born and in the coming war many a red shirt died on the blades of variously coloured lightsabers. Soon American Suburbia fell, followed by the cities. As all of civilisation fell to insane fandom. Soon, from deep in the wild, the great rednecks rose and atempted to gain their own territory. The war was then fought on three fronts. Neither of the parties even considering allies. Down are the days of infinite variety in infinite combinations. There can be only one winner in the great war of atrition that stretches the globe. Soon, nuclear fallout had come to pass.

Flashback done, Jimmy, no, wait, Billy, the Shatnerite in a foxhole created by a stray imperial morter round dies of a surprising hasbro lightsaber stab to the neck. His soul floated away through his fake vulcan ears in much the same way a brick doesn’t.

The ears themselves are another story alltobether, collected by squads of jedi and word around their neck to probe their skill.

Written by CyberFaust

Martie 15, 2010 at 12:36 pm

Publicat în Random ramblings

Shutter Island REVIEW

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Noul film al lui Martin Scorsese, Shutter island, este un film foarte bun(parerea mea). Urmeaza sa va explic de ce.

Atmosfera intretinuta este cheia intregului film. Cadrele si lumina de film noir abunda. Decorul si muzica sunt sinistre. Intreg contextul de insula furtunoasa cu un sanatoriu pentru oamenii violenti este si ea sinistra.  Personajele, pacientii isterici sau  suspicios de linistiti, disparitiile si inconsecventele, gardienii constant vigilenti si personalul tacut al spitalului. Intreg filmul iti da unsemtiment foarte dubios. E o mancarime psihologica pe care nu o poti plasa sau scarpina, un deja-vu, un sentiment de panica chiar sub suprafata. Ceva teribil se intampla pe Shutter Island. Ceva ce nu se intampla decat in locuri sinistre si furtunoase care au o istorie de violenta.

Intreaga actiune a filmului are loc pe o insula penitenciar Shutter Island. O insula la 17 km de tarmul USA. La inceputul filmului aflam ca o pacienta a disparut misterios din sanatoriul situat pe insula. Pentru a investiga disparitia, biroul US Marshals a trimis 2 agenti  Teddy Daniels (Leonardo DiCaprio) si Chuck Aule (Mark Ruffalo). Ajungand pe insula devin suspiciosi, totul este putin ciudat, privirile si atitudinile sunt fortate si putin la nealocul lor. Shutter Island ascunde ceva. Curand il cunoastem pe doctorul responsabil pentru azil, Dr. Cawley, jucat foarte bine de Ben Kingsley. In timpul interogarilor si a anchetei Agentul Teddy incepe sa isi dea seama ca secretul insulei este legat de propriul sau trecut. De lagarele de concentrare pe care le-a vazut cand era soldat in WW2.

De aici nu mai zic nimic despre asta pentru ca trebuie sa vedeti filmul singuri.

Actiunea are un pas alert care nu te lasa foarte mult stand linistit. Intamplarile sunt confuze, repetarile de flashback nu par repetitive deloc, fiind legate perfect in poveste si in pacing-ul filmului. Scorsese a incercat sa incurce si sa fascineze prin modul in care povestea este spusa.

Publicul devine detectiv, incercand sa isi dea seama ce se intampla pe insula. Atmosfera exceptionala si pasul alert fac drumurile la baie foarte grele de frica sa nu pierzi ceva esential si sa ratezi concluzia. Personaleje sunt si ele fascinante si excelent jucate. Iar derularea povestii, gandita foarte bine din pct. de vedere psihologic te lasa ghicind pana in ultimul moment. Concluzia este si ea epica, satisfacatoare chiar. Nu iti lasa in stomac un gol, o nevoie de a afla mai mult.

Shutter island este un film foarte bine gandit, jucat si regizat. Cu muzica si imagine care se completeaza excelent reciproc in crearea unei armosfere superbe de film noir. Mister si claustrofobie. Un film care merita vazut la cinema, cu popcorn si mountain dew.

Written by CyberFaust

Martie 2, 2010 at 8:41 pm